Twas the Day Before Thanksgiving

Everybody wants out of jail for the holidays, and the days before Thanksgiving and Xmas see a surge in jail chain activity. I was inspired for a few minutes, but couldn’t finish this, the original poem is really long and there is a lot of ground to cover. But I’ll leave it here and get back to vacationing.

Twas the day before Thanksgiving and all through the jail,
Every inmate was stirring,
But couldn’t make bail,

The inmates were shackled by the jailers with care
In hopes that the public defender, would soon be there

The jail chain was nestled, all snug in a line
Hoping their back time could cover their fines
The prosecutors bring a bucket, the files for the day
With visions of vesting or running for DA

When from the judge’s chambers arose such a clatter
The judge finally appeared to hear today’s matters
Up towards the bench, they clamored to plead
For hot checks, DWI, shoplifting, or weed

Fresh ink on plea forms, like blue pee on snow
Pragmatically saying “guilty”, for all to know
When what to their wondering eyes should appear,
An unjolly PO, whose rules they must adhere

She spoke many a word about UA’s and fees
The inmates not very certain, they could handle all these
byzantine rules and pay all this cash
If they could they would have fought the case, and not plead so fast

They sprang from the jail, calling home for a ride
And away they all flew like bees from a hive
But I heard one exclaim, ‘ere they drove at great speed,
“60 days is too long for just smoking weed!”


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