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Texas AG Bans “Cocaine” Energy Drink, Real Cocaine Still Readily Available

The drug war is working so well we should consider expansion. Forget the salvia debate. Think broader. Why should we limit prohibitionist zealotry to actual drugs? If only we could expand the WOD to ban products named after street drugs.

From the AG’s website

Court prohibits the selling of a drink marketed as street drug alternative in Texas
DALLAS – Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott has resolved the state’s enforcement action against the sellers of the energy drink, “Cocaine.” Under the judgment, the product cannot be sold in the state of Texas and all Internet marketing must disclose that the product is not available in Texas. Because Redux Beverages L.L.C. failed to appear in court, the judge entered a judgment and permanent injunction with civil penalties of $825,000.

A “street drug alternative”, really? Cocaine is not a fungible good. Dealers/users aren’t turning to energy drinks when they run out of blow. And they don’t have to. While “Cocaine” the energy drink has been banned, the real version remains readily available across Texas.

Also, shouldn’t the AG want users to abandon the real thing for New Coke? The WOD would be a farce if not for the abundant tragedy.

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5 Responses to “Texas AG Bans “Cocaine” Energy Drink, Real Cocaine Still Readily Available”

  1. But it’s for the CHILDREN!

    I wonder if there is an underground market for selling the Cocaine energy drink, brought on by the Prohibition of…nevermind.

    So rather than letting people look at the myriad energy drinks and decide for themselves if they want to purchase one labeled the same as “llello”, Big Daddy Government steps in to “protect us”.

    It was brilliant marketing, nothing else. In my opinion, our AG needs to spend time on important things…like policing oyster criminals!

  2. Jaimee says:

    Amen Eric! I actually know the people at Redux Beverages and they are very nice, normal people with a rather brilliant marketing plan. They received more national coverage than any start up company could have ever paid for. However the stigma that has been completely blown out of proportion (no pun intended) is absurd! It’s an energy drink, plain and simple. There is nothing any more harmful in their product than in any other mainstream energy drink. I am very familiar with their marketing and they never claimed to cure any health issues. It was a fun idea for a very commercial product that many people had fun with. I think the AG should have actually tried the product before he wasted his time and the Texan taxpayers money taking a case like this to court. I have to believe there are much more pressing issues that should have received attention, not a beverage…

  3. Mark says:

    Really? Backwards Texas does this now? COME ON! anyone with a brain can tell this stuff doesn’t have any drugs in it (caffeine is NOT a drug). It’s named this way as a joke. It’s just an example of how people blow stuff way out of proportion when anything might be seen as “suggestive,” probably why it was named “cocaine” to begin with.

  4. Anonymous says:

    DURP DURP DURP THEY TOOK OUR JORRBSS!!! God dam retards. That is a rather good energy drink.

  5. John Public says:

    Remember Candy Cigarettes and bubble gum cigars? Children now days usually do not get the parenting the older generation did. No all but some parents are too busy to know what their kids are doing and failed to teach them values and morals. Do you liberals really think it’s a good idea to have a beverage alled ‘Cocaine’? Please, dont be an idiot.