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Mystery Science Theater 5000

Have you ever wanted to see the Intoxilyzer 5000 without being arrested? Here it is. The Bill of Rights is under assault by an Atari 2600.

How does it work? Here is the operator manual.

Is it accurate? We don’t really know. The State’s Conviction machine runs on secret software that has not been independently reviewed for errors.

A similar breath test machine, the Draeger AlcoTest 7110, recently had it’s source code revealed and analyzed. The findings are alarming. I predict the Intoxilyzer software will be found to be similarly flawed.

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4 Responses to “Mystery Science Theater 5000”

  1. <img src="http://www.blogge says:

    It’s odd that the source code has not been released for independent corroboration of its functionality. Apparently, “Your machine has not been confirmed as accurate” isn’t a defense, even though it is logically one of the first arguments a man would make if disputing the result in an informal setting.

  2. <img src="http://www.blogge says:

    These Conviction machines should be outlawed for the same reasons polygraph tests are not admissable. The science is bogus and the tests are subject to manipulation.

  3. <img src="http://www.blogger.c says:

    For some reason that I can’t put my finger on I find the beginning of that instruction manual oddly humorous. Something about the combination of the metric system (of which I am a proponent), Texas, and cops (neither of which I am a fan of (sorry rob not a lone star state fan))I see it now:enter Texas ranger with manual in hand.”What’s all this Frenchie stuff, huh kilogram, from now on… Freedo-gram.”Let me just postscript this with a note that I know I am not comedic genius and I fully intend to keep my day job.BTW – sorry about disappearing in the middle of a conversation there, just started school again (after a many year break).

  4. Brian says:

    Amazing. Technology that dates back to the Atari 2600 stays static while the DUI laws change year in and year out.

    If the point of conviction is at .08 these days, should we not also be allowed to have updated machinery to test these outcomes?

    I just blew a .09 on the 5000 and am being tried for DUI. I WAS NOT drunk and now have to spend thousands in lawyer fees to battle this claim while safe guarding my operator privileges and job.

    Software by nature degrades through use. Just look at how many times your computer does “Windows Updates”. I get the Intox 5000 never gets updates.

    What a total hoax. If the state needed money that badly, why did they not just ask for $5000 check from me. I would have written it.